Man on the TV today was sayin how we live in the most exciting times with new developments daily and enough activity going on to satisfy anybody no matter where his interests tended.

Well, maybe that’s true, but I’m not entirely sure that everything going on in the world today either interests or excites me. And about the only people today’s world seems to satisfy are gossips and doomsayers.

Actually, I don’t much care for where things are headed in this country today, or much of the rest of the world, for that matter. I don’t much like the music, the movies, the sports, the politics, the government, the religions, the schools . . . . .

In fact, I liked America better when the typical American was a little cocky but still able to back up his boasts,

When women had some meat on their bones and danced jitterbugs and boogie woogie

When “Made in America” meant something all over the damned world

When girls dressed like girls and boys didn’t wear earrings and ponytails

When you could understand the words to the songs on the radio

When basketball had layups and skill instead of slam dunks and tattoos

When desecrating the flag could endanger some really sensitive parts of your anatomy

When even the raciest movies still left something to the imagination

When common sense and good citizenship were more important than lawsuits and restraining orders

When baseball was the national sport and was fun to listen to

When calling somebody a bastard or sonofabitch was a grave insult

When cars were made of metal and a stop-light rear-ender didn’t mean total loss

When tennis required athleticism and finesse instead of 130mph serves and 3-shot points

When the private lives of presidents and senators were off limits to tabloids

When finding amphetamines or crack cocaine was damned near impossible

When schools stressed fundamentals before sensitivity training and multiculturalism

When sometimes you didn’t get to play because you just weren’t quite good enough

When steroids were something doctors considered for unresponsive patients

When lawyers considered truth and ethics as important as winning every case

When popular music didn’t actually damage your hearing

When you had to go to a burlesque theater to hear bathroom humor

When families ate at least 2 meals together almost every day

When a dad could take 2 kids to a ball game without taking out a second mortgage

When all you needed to set your car’s timing was a good ear and a crescent wrench

When laws and social rules applied to athletes and entertainers as well as John Q.

When O.J. would have been found guilty and Jerry Wright would have been tarred and feathered

When people knew where “We, the People” and “When in the Course of Human Events” are written

When Grandma and Grandpa could die with dignity in their own beds with their family near them

When treason and sedition were punished severely

When people didn’t overextend their debt limits on junk they didn’t really need

When no professional athlete’s contract was worth more than the GNP of Portugal

When coming to and living in America meant following the rules and obeying the laws

When nobody got upset if people said a prayer at commencement ceremonies or public hearings

When Social Security wasn’t taxed and the general fund wasn’t available for Congress to mess with

When only one language, English, was used in business, schools, and government

Yeah, I’m pretty tired of the bickering and the hard-headed refusal by high-level officials to understand why people can’t see things the way they’re “supposed” to. I’m tired of this election, and I’m tired of Clintons, and I’m tired of liberals who believe that the only reason Socialism hasn’t worked out quite right yet is that the proper people haven’t been in charge of it. I’m tired of politicians who believe the way to steady up the economy is to tax the middle class out of existence. And I’m tired of party-line votes in Congress for the sole purpose of stifling and frustrating the opposition despite how much benefit a bill would have to the entire populace. I am especially tired of idiots who fervently believe that an omniscient, omnipotent superbeing wants them to violently slaughter people for completely whimsical and petty reasons.

Boy, am I tired. Glad my house is paid off and I get Social Security with my two retirement incomes and my wife makes chump change plus her own Social Security so we can still afford $4/gallon gasoline and outrageous insurance costs and skyrocketing food prices and ever-increasing property taxes and runaway utility bills. Even more glad that I had the opportunity to live through all those whens, even for just a little while, ‘cause my grandchildren haven’t a ghost of a chance of living as well as my wife and I have. Where did it all go? Who was the dirty bastard that screwed it all up? Who stuck his hand 8 inches up the golden goose’s ass and ripped out the egg chute? JFK? LBJ? RFK? MLK? JEC? WJC?