For the gal who has everything....but a date for Valentine’s Day.

Nothing says FUCK YOU better than a golden vibrator!

TAS

CraigC

I’d just about KILL for this!!!!!!

Please! Please! Please! I promise to be bad!!

Scorpius

*clap*clap*clap*

graffic courtesy of David Lunde

Lucy?

Lahore, February 8: At least 3,000 protesters enraged by the alleged desecration of the Koran clashed with police and torched two cinemas in Pakistan’s second largest city Lahore, police said on Wednesday.

The trouble erupted late on Tuesday when copies of the Muslim holy book were found lying in a drain in the Bhatta chowk area on the fringes of the sprawling city.

“The news of the desecration of the Koran spread quickly in the neighbourhood and within no time some three to four thousand people took to the streets shouting slogans against the desecration,” Abbas said.

...police have registered a case against unknown people under the country’s blasphemy laws.

Ok—people don’t ‘over-react.’ People react rationally in light of their own perspective and understanding of the world/situation.  Said understanding may well be completely wonky, but people perceive their reactions to be reasonable.

So; ya live in a country where the act of plopping a Koran in a street drain is illegal—with huge penalties.  Ya see a Koran in a street drain.  So ya go out and hit random strangers with sticks and set fire to your own neighborhood buildings.  I need some help connecting these dots.  [are the people of Lahore as alienated as the people of South Central LA?]

Six gay penguins at a German zoo are still refusing to mate with females of the species flown in from Sweden in 2005, the zoo said.

The problem was that the female Humboldt penguins have proven too shy in their advances, the director of the zoo in the northern port city of Bremerhaven said.

“The Swedes will not make the first move,” Heike Kueck said.

The females were flown in last year in a bid to bring the males to mate and help save the Humboldt species from extinction.

Kueck said last year she was optimistic the initiative would be successful because zoo keepers had noticed that at one point a female penguin had managed to cause a couple of males to “separate”.

The zoo has 10 male penguins of which six have shown strong signs of preferring male company and formed couples among themselves.

The initiative to “turn” the penguins and make them mate had prompted a furious response from gay rights groups.

In a statement posted on its Internet website, the zoo on Wednesday sought to defend itself from fresh criticism.

“We will be delighted if the penguins form even one heterosexual couple and manage to produce first an egg, and then a little one,” it said.

“But of course we accept the male couples that have formed and we are not trying to enforce heterosexuality, as we were accused of doing last year.”

The latest public figure to stand accused of defiling the Prophet Mohamed is not some Danish cartoonist, or French newspaper editor, but a hapless British Page 3 girl called Emma B.

Yesterday, the erotic retailer Ann Summers unveiled Miss B as the “face” of its new range of products.

Not 24 hours later, she finds herself on the front line of Islamic protest after Muslim leaders discovered that the range includes a new blow-up doll, called “Mustafa Shag”.

Unfortunately, Mustafa was one of the names given to the Prophet Mohamed. Bestowing it upon, in the words of its catalogue, “an inflatable escort for your hen-night adventures” is considered highly offensive.

The Manchester Central Mosque has already written to the firm, calling on it to withdraw the product, right.

“You have no idea how much hurt, anguish, and disgust this obnoxious phrase ["Mustafa Shag"] has caused to Muslim men, women and children,” reads their letter.

“We are asking you to please relent on compassionate grounds, and have our Most Reverend Prophet’s Name “Mustafa” (Peace Be Upon Him) and the afflicted word ‘shag’ removed as soon as possible.”

MR. Tvrtko (PBUY)

That wasn’t quite what I had in mind.

THE rosaries-ovaries T-shirt warn by an Australian Greens senator was deeply offensive to Catholics, Prime Minister John Howard said today.

Australian Greens Senator Kerry Nettle wore the “keep your rosaries off my ovaries” T-shirt earlier this week as the Senate started its emotion charged debate over who should control the abortion drug RU486.

The T-shirt was sponsored by the Young Women’s Christian Association (YWCA).

Mr Howard today said the message was offensive to Catholics across the country.

“I think that was deeply offensive to many Australian Catholics,” he told Southern Cross Broadcasting.

He said the Greens were sneering at a religious practice and journalists encouraged it.

“The Greens Party can practically sneer at Catholic devotional practice and think it’s funny and to see some journalists standing around grinning as if the whole thing’s a joke,” he said.

But he said Senator Nettle had the right to express herself and it should not be a criminal offence to make derogatory remarks about a particular religion.

“She has a right to do that- it’s a free country,” he said.

“It’s an expression of free speech and just as I don’t believe there should be a law making it a criminal offence to burn the Australian flag ... I’m not trying to stop Senator Nettle doing something like that.

“But I’m expressing the view that it’s deeply offensive.

”And it’s the kind of silly undergraduate contribution to this debate which is regrettable but that’s democracy.”

Once again, Michael Ramirez proves why he is probably the most brilliant political cartoonist on the planet.

It also shows us why the editors of the LA Times are complete idiots.

**via Bane**

Little Sheri comes home from first grade and tells her father that they learned about the history of Valentine’s Day.  And, “Since Valentine’s Day is for a Christian saint and we’re Jewish,” she asks, “will God get mad at me for giving someone a valentine?

Sheri’s father thinks a bit, and then he says “No, I don’t think God would get mad. Who do you want to give a valentine to?”

“Osama Bin Laden,” she says.

“Why Osama Bin Laden,” her father asks in shock?

“Well,” she says, “I thought that if a little American Jewish girl could have enough love to give Osama a valentine, he might start to think that maybe we’re not all bad, and maybe start loving people a little bit.

And if other kids saw what I did and then they sent valentines to Osama, he’d love everyone a lot.  And then he’d start going all over the place tell everyone how much he loved them and how he didn’t hate anyone anymore.”

Her father’s heart swells and he looks at his daughter with newfound pride. “Sheri, that’s the most wonderful thing I’ve ever heard.”

“I know,” Sheri says, “and once that gets him out in the open, the Marines could blow him to hell.”

TBK [who is on f’n fire today]

But don’t worry....I’ll be fine with a little rest and respite and some fresh air and sunshine!

fizzix